Loving an adult child sometimes means
Loving them when they say things to hurt you
And you forgive them
Not only for hurting you
But for not understanding
That you have forgiven them
For not knowing you have forgiven them
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Don't Be The Kind of Father Who . . . (12/17/2009)
As your children stand at your casket,
silent tears falling from their eyes,
they mourn not only the physical loss
of the man who was their father,
but also the missed opportunities
when they were children growing up
with a man who was basically such a good man, really,
but also someone who was very hard to love.
Because loving you exposed them to so much hurt.
Roots of our Nation . . . ??? (12/16/2010)
http://www.wtv-zone.com/Mary/forsakenroots.html
HUH??
Here is ANOTHER website FULL of statements made by our Founding Fathers.
http://rationalrevolution.net/articles/history_of_the_separation_of_chu.htmReading what someone has ACTUALLY said or written (rather than what some Media person or email says they said) -- whether it be our current president or the Founding Fathers -- is always enlightening -- at least to me.
The Founding Fathers definitely believed that religion was a personal matter and all citizens had the right to worship -- or not -- as they chose. That included Christians, Jews, Muslims, Deists, Atheists, and/or any others.
Some of these men were Christians of one sort or another, some were Deists. Certainly they DID NOT want the government telling them who or what they could worship. One reason so many left England was to get away from exactly that.
Individual colonies DID, early on, enact legislation referencing God and/or Jesus Christ. The wording of their constitutions was superceded when the U.S. Constrtution was enacted, however, and the 14th Amendment eventually clarified the issue once and for all.
Probably I am influenced by the fact that my youngest daughter married a Muslim -- they are now divorced -- and so my grand-daughter, Leila, 21, who currently lives with me -- has a father she loves who is NOT Christian. As you can imagine, she struggles, and is sometimes hurt, by things said and done over issues not of her making or in her control.
The current climate against Muslims is strongly reminescent of that against the Communists which culminated in the McCarthy hearings.
In 1954 the Cummunists were secretly planning the overthrow of the U.S. Government.
In 2010 the Muslims are secretly planning the overthrow of the "Infidels"; i.e., U.S. government and its citizens.
Is this true? Are Muslims a modern-day "Trojan Horse in our country? I don't know.
There are two possibilities that quickly come to mind -- neither one good because it would be the end of the U.S. as we know it.
1) Either we support/practice/believe in the principals of freedom -- religious and otherwise --upon which this country was founded -- with the possibility that the _________ bad guys (fill in the blank with Muslims, Communists, Jews, Blacks, women, Irish Catholics--whatever your particular prejudice may be) get to be the majority and take over and take us down
OR
2) We deny the principals upon which this country was founded to certain of our citizens we don't like and with whom we disagree --
Either way, we're done.
There is a THIRD possibility/option -- which is, of course, that we could all learn to live together peaceably and respectfully in this great and wonderful America . . . and truly be an example to the world of justice.
Two examples -- one circulating re his press conference on April 6, 2010, in Turkey -- when his comments were taken out of context (surprise!, surprise!) and misrepresented.
What he actually said was: "One of the great strengths of the United States is … we have a very large Christian population -- we do not consider ourselves a Christian nation or a Jewish nation or a Muslim nation. We consider ourselves a nation of citizens who are bound by ideals and a set of values."
He was partly referencing the Treaty of Tripoli, 1796 --
website -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treaty_of_Tripoli
check out what the treaty says -- it states,"As the government of the United States is in no sense founded on the Christian religion" . . . ) Now that WAS a surprise. But if you read the entire statement, it clarifies what is being said and what is being said is a good thing -- a bridge builder between nations.
I believe President Obama has done wonders in restoring credibility and respect for the USA because he is a consumate diplomat when meeting with people of other cultures and religions. Listen to his recent speech to the Indonesians –
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kacZTEEZkNI
I wonder how many people under 60 actually know the phrase "under God" was NOT part of the Pledge of Alliegiance when first penned. It was added in 1954. I was in school and remember reciting it daily -- both ways.
Or that "In God We Trust" was not added to our coins until after the Civil War.
Praise God for ALL Our Freedoms, especially that of Religion!
How grateful I am that I have no need to justify or defend my beliefs with unfounded claims or distortions of my country's origins.
d
HUH??
Here is ANOTHER website FULL of statements made by our Founding Fathers.
http://rationalrevolution.net/articles/history_of_the_separation_of_chu.htmReading what someone has ACTUALLY said or written (rather than what some Media person or email says they said) -- whether it be our current president or the Founding Fathers -- is always enlightening -- at least to me.
The Founding Fathers definitely believed that religion was a personal matter and all citizens had the right to worship -- or not -- as they chose. That included Christians, Jews, Muslims, Deists, Atheists, and/or any others.
Some of these men were Christians of one sort or another, some were Deists. Certainly they DID NOT want the government telling them who or what they could worship. One reason so many left England was to get away from exactly that.
Individual colonies DID, early on, enact legislation referencing God and/or Jesus Christ. The wording of their constitutions was superceded when the U.S. Constrtution was enacted, however, and the 14th Amendment eventually clarified the issue once and for all.
=========
Even though I am a Christian, I have a slightly different take on some things happening in our country right now than some others, including my own children! Probably I am influenced by the fact that my youngest daughter married a Muslim -- they are now divorced -- and so my grand-daughter, Leila, 21, who currently lives with me -- has a father she loves who is NOT Christian. As you can imagine, she struggles, and is sometimes hurt, by things said and done over issues not of her making or in her control.
The current climate against Muslims is strongly reminescent of that against the Communists which culminated in the McCarthy hearings.
In 1954 the Cummunists were secretly planning the overthrow of the U.S. Government.
In 2010 the Muslims are secretly planning the overthrow of the "Infidels"; i.e., U.S. government and its citizens.
Is this true? Are Muslims a modern-day "Trojan Horse in our country? I don't know.
There are two possibilities that quickly come to mind -- neither one good because it would be the end of the U.S. as we know it.
1) Either we support/practice/believe in the principals of freedom -- religious and otherwise --upon which this country was founded -- with the possibility that the _________ bad guys (fill in the blank with Muslims, Communists, Jews, Blacks, women, Irish Catholics--whatever your particular prejudice may be) get to be the majority and take over and take us down
OR
2) We deny the principals upon which this country was founded to certain of our citizens we don't like and with whom we disagree --
Either way, we're done.
There is a THIRD possibility/option -- which is, of course, that we could all learn to live together peaceably and respectfully in this great and wonderful America . . . and truly be an example to the world of justice.
**********
The hateful climate surrounding our President is frightening, to say the least. The distortions and outright lies circulating are beyond belief.Two examples -- one circulating re his press conference on April 6, 2010, in Turkey -- when his comments were taken out of context (surprise!, surprise!) and misrepresented.
What he actually said was: "One of the great strengths of the United States is … we have a very large Christian population -- we do not consider ourselves a Christian nation or a Jewish nation or a Muslim nation. We consider ourselves a nation of citizens who are bound by ideals and a set of values."
He was partly referencing the Treaty of Tripoli, 1796 --
website -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treaty_of_Tripoli
check out what the treaty says -- it states,"As the government of the United States is in no sense founded on the Christian religion" . . . ) Now that WAS a surprise. But if you read the entire statement, it clarifies what is being said and what is being said is a good thing -- a bridge builder between nations.
I believe President Obama has done wonders in restoring credibility and respect for the USA because he is a consumate diplomat when meeting with people of other cultures and religions. Listen to his recent speech to the Indonesians –
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kacZTEEZkNI
I wonder how many people under 60 actually know the phrase "under God" was NOT part of the Pledge of Alliegiance when first penned. It was added in 1954. I was in school and remember reciting it daily -- both ways.
Or that "In God We Trust" was not added to our coins until after the Civil War.
Praise God for ALL Our Freedoms, especially that of Religion!
How grateful I am that I have no need to justify or defend my beliefs with unfounded claims or distortions of my country's origins.
d
Saturday, January 1, 2011
A House Full of Kids (12/15/1995)
As I sat signing my Christmas cards this evening, December 20, 1995, I came across a card I'd received from Joyce McGowan, a dear neighbor from another time, another place. Another me.
I noted she had moved from Vernon Avenue in Huntington Woods, Michigan, where we had lived as neighbors for so many years. Her husband, Mickey, died a few years ago but I never imagined she would move, and I wrote a note to say, "Take care, dear old friend." Unexpectedly, my eyes filled with tears. They splattered on the words I had written as images of her house, that beautiful old house across the street from ours, blocked out the present.
The images continued, the years fell away, and once again, I was there.
It seemed to be summer and the sun was shining; the colors brilliant. The huge old trees that lined the street were laden with foliage, the well-cared-for lawns were lush with deep green grass, and the sky was startlingly blue. The picture in my mind was of our street as though I was looking out from my house to hers.
I didn't actually see her but I knew she was there. In her house full of kids. And I was there. In my house full of kids. We were friendly, borrowing neighbors and our kids played together and got into trouble together.
And I wondered why it had seemed so often hard at the time to be there in that house full of kids. Then it seemed that the cares of the day often overwhelmed me. So many little hands and feet and mouths to wash, to dress, to feed. Too many dishes and clothes to wash, too many dinners to cook, too much dust to sweep, too many trips to Krogers, to the doctors, to the school, too many . . . not enough me.
Funny how time puts a different perspective on things. If I could be there right now, today, somehow I would find the patience to do it better this time. This time I would know to just hold those little kids and hug them tight and tell them how precious they were to me. Every day. Several times a day.
Today it would be such fun to gather them in the tub and wash their sturdy little bodies. I would relish the feel of their wonderfully tender skin as I rinsed and dried them with a big fluffy towel. And once again I would kiss them in that delightful, most vulnerable spot right where their neck and shoulders meet.
Today it would be such a joy to help them get ready for bed. Each one a different age, a different size. Each one needing a little more or less of mommy's helping hand. And then I would set them on the couch, my four little stair-step cherubs. And we would read some bedtime stories. Then, as I tucked each one into bed with one special song, I would give them one last kiss and hug as I listened to them say their prayers.
I did those things back then, of course. But not always so joyfully, I think.
To have lived at 10075 Vernon Avenue in Huntington Woods, Michigan, in a house full of kids.
I noted she had moved from Vernon Avenue in Huntington Woods, Michigan, where we had lived as neighbors for so many years. Her husband, Mickey, died a few years ago but I never imagined she would move, and I wrote a note to say, "Take care, dear old friend." Unexpectedly, my eyes filled with tears. They splattered on the words I had written as images of her house, that beautiful old house across the street from ours, blocked out the present.
The images continued, the years fell away, and once again, I was there.
It seemed to be summer and the sun was shining; the colors brilliant. The huge old trees that lined the street were laden with foliage, the well-cared-for lawns were lush with deep green grass, and the sky was startlingly blue. The picture in my mind was of our street as though I was looking out from my house to hers.
I didn't actually see her but I knew she was there. In her house full of kids. And I was there. In my house full of kids. We were friendly, borrowing neighbors and our kids played together and got into trouble together.
And I wondered why it had seemed so often hard at the time to be there in that house full of kids. Then it seemed that the cares of the day often overwhelmed me. So many little hands and feet and mouths to wash, to dress, to feed. Too many dishes and clothes to wash, too many dinners to cook, too much dust to sweep, too many trips to Krogers, to the doctors, to the school, too many . . . not enough me.
Funny how time puts a different perspective on things. If I could be there right now, today, somehow I would find the patience to do it better this time. This time I would know to just hold those little kids and hug them tight and tell them how precious they were to me. Every day. Several times a day.
Today it would be such fun to gather them in the tub and wash their sturdy little bodies. I would relish the feel of their wonderfully tender skin as I rinsed and dried them with a big fluffy towel. And once again I would kiss them in that delightful, most vulnerable spot right where their neck and shoulders meet.
Today it would be such a joy to help them get ready for bed. Each one a different age, a different size. Each one needing a little more or less of mommy's helping hand. And then I would set them on the couch, my four little stair-step cherubs. And we would read some bedtime stories. Then, as I tucked each one into bed with one special song, I would give them one last kiss and hug as I listened to them say their prayers.
I did those things back then, of course. But not always so joyfully, I think.
* * * * *
As I sit here at my dining room table signing Christmas cards in 1995 remembering my dear old friend and the lives we lived back then, it seems like it must have been the loveliest, most wonderful thing I can think of . . .To have lived at 10075 Vernon Avenue in Huntington Woods, Michigan, in a house full of kids.
Dawn Coyle Bohannon
December 1995
Friday, December 31, 2010
Email to Kids and Some Others (1) (12/01/2010)
http://bcfoley.blogspot.com/2010/12/changes-are-coming.html
This (above) is what The Former Eternal Optomist, Pollyanna (me) is 'talkin' about, Willus.'
'Cept the writer (above) spells it out clearly.
It's also why I disagree when I hear a public figure talk about how intelligent the American people are. They are lazy and self-indulgent and want to simply push a button for whatever they want . . . and they want it now. The flip side/down side of this technology is up and running. Like the dominoes that start to fall . . . or the boat that approaches the waterfall, the time for turning back has passed. This generation continues to happily hand off all aspects of their privacy without a clue or regard for the consequences.
Being a child in the Decade of the Forties was one of the biggest blessings in my life! I will miss some of the consequences waiting 'round the bend.
Love,
Mom
This (above) is what The Former Eternal Optomist, Pollyanna (me) is 'talkin' about, Willus.'
'Cept the writer (above) spells it out clearly.
It's also why I disagree when I hear a public figure talk about how intelligent the American people are. They are lazy and self-indulgent and want to simply push a button for whatever they want . . . and they want it now. The flip side/down side of this technology is up and running. Like the dominoes that start to fall . . . or the boat that approaches the waterfall, the time for turning back has passed. This generation continues to happily hand off all aspects of their privacy without a clue or regard for the consequences.
Being a child in the Decade of the Forties was one of the biggest blessings in my life! I will miss some of the consequences waiting 'round the bend.
Love,
Mom
Email to Kids and Other Friends (2) (12/21/2010)
Merry Christmas to All !http://www.skeeterbitesreport.com/2010/12/christians-worries-about-so-called-war.html
Interesting article offering thoughtful perspective. (Kids, you may remember from your childhood, this is why the Church of Christ does not celebrate Christmas as a religious holiday and has no special Christmas service.)
I trust your faith, like mine, can withstand the scrutiny of facts.
Love,
Mom/d
Interesting article offering thoughtful perspective. (Kids, you may remember from your childhood, this is why the Church of Christ does not celebrate Christmas as a religious holiday and has no special Christmas service.)
I trust your faith, like mine, can withstand the scrutiny of facts.
Love,
Mom/d
Message to the President (12/30/2010)
Dear Mr. President --
You can likely tell from my email address where I'm coming from, although I would clarify by saying I am a conservative Liberal.
That means I believe in personal responsibility, standing up for your principals no matter what, and working hard to achieve your goals. In other words, get up, get dressed, and SHOW UP for work. And forgiveness.
And with your election, I again believed I could hold my American grey head high.
You and your wife continue to set a much-needed and refreshingly honorable example to the rest of us. DO NOT CAVE!!!
BECAUSE -- we are ALL fed up with Congress. Tell them to start earning their pay. I now believe in term limits because of their conduct in the past ten years.
Bring BACK the JOBS. Quickly. Reward American companies for staying on AMERICAN SOIL.
Restrict the benefits of members of Congress to those given the American people.
A great quick way to fix the Big Mess would be to pitch out all the rules and regulations since the Constitution, Declaration of Independence, and Bill of Rights. Begin anew with EACH piece of legislation limited to ONE ISSUE/SUBJECT and no more than THREE TYPED PAGES!!!!
A THOUSAND-PAGE Health Care Bill?? Are you kidding?
I support health care reform but cannot answer the criticisms directed at me by my own children (staunch Republicans who get their news from FOXX and Glenn Beck—BLEGGHHH!!!) with regard to this legislative monstrosity.)
Most of us believe it is too late to save this country; we are already too close to the Falls in our rickety old boat.
It would take a miracle to reverse the tide.
And yet, I DO believe in miracles.
Dawn Bohannon
72-year-old single mother of (4), grandmother of (11), great-grandmother of 1, soon to be 2, part-time writer/genealogist
You can likely tell from my email address where I'm coming from, although I would clarify by saying I am a conservative Liberal.
That means I believe in personal responsibility, standing up for your principals no matter what, and working hard to achieve your goals. In other words, get up, get dressed, and SHOW UP for work. And forgiveness.
And with your election, I again believed I could hold my American grey head high.
You and your wife continue to set a much-needed and refreshingly honorable example to the rest of us. DO NOT CAVE!!!
BECAUSE -- we are ALL fed up with Congress. Tell them to start earning their pay. I now believe in term limits because of their conduct in the past ten years.
Bring BACK the JOBS. Quickly. Reward American companies for staying on AMERICAN SOIL.
Restrict the benefits of members of Congress to those given the American people.
A great quick way to fix the Big Mess would be to pitch out all the rules and regulations since the Constitution, Declaration of Independence, and Bill of Rights. Begin anew with EACH piece of legislation limited to ONE ISSUE/SUBJECT and no more than THREE TYPED PAGES!!!!
A THOUSAND-PAGE Health Care Bill?? Are you kidding?
I support health care reform but cannot answer the criticisms directed at me by my own children (staunch Republicans who get their news from FOXX and Glenn Beck—BLEGGHHH!!!) with regard to this legislative monstrosity.)
Most of us believe it is too late to save this country; we are already too close to the Falls in our rickety old boat.
It would take a miracle to reverse the tide.
And yet, I DO believe in miracles.
Dawn Bohannon
72-year-old single mother of (4), grandmother of (11), great-grandmother of 1, soon to be 2, part-time writer/genealogist
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